I first heard Psalm 51:7 when I had my Ethics class December of 2012.
I don’t know why but somewhere in me I want to be pure. I want to be whiter than snow.
I was Roman Catholic back then.
I remember when I had Theology 2 back in 2012, we were required by my professor to volunteer in our respective churches. It’s like an OJT. We have our time logs or was it a journal. We should have a certificate or letter than we indeed volunteered. I was really having a hard time to do that. I wasn’t really active in church. I was just a church goer even as an ex-Roman Catholic. I went to this one diocese. They said they can’t accomodate me to volunteer because I live in a different area. But since I had a friend who was active in that diocese, she helped me joined their Marian cult. We prayed the rosary; we sort of glorified Mary. As a born again Christian, what I did was super idolatrous. Then somewhere in me, I can’t do this every Sunday. So I went to another diocese, and they were accomodating to allow me to volunteer. And what I did there was I attend mass. After that, I go with this lay person to go held a mini-mass to an elderly woman who has diabetes. I was made to read the Bible. The lay person gave the communion bread. I kept doing that weekly. Until I got my letter certifying me of what I did. I thought that would help me in my UST Faculty of Medicine application. I was terribly wrong because Lord Jesus Christ entirely changed me.
Prior to finishing that volunteer thingy for Theology 2, I asked some of my fellow classmates where they volunteered. And this one friend of mine who is a born again Christian told me she is attending Victory Ubelt. Before I don’t know where was that no matter how many times she tells me the location. I thought it was some shady organization.
Also that year 2012, some of my born again Christian classmates organized late bible studies. You know what? I was so envious of them I wanted to be a part of their group. I wasn’t the loner type. I could be loner but I try to talk with people whom I like. I’m not just the friendly type. Little did I know those little things that happen in 2012 were my calling that Lord Jesus Christ wants me out of the system of Roman Catholicism. That Psalm 51:7. That project in Theology 2 and my friend who attends Victory Ubelt and volunteered in Production (?) Ministry. Those late bible study nights by some of my classmates. My born again Christian dad who went home for good from working abroad.
I failed to listen to all of these in 2012.
If I could have listen, right now I would have experienced a ministry.
If I could have listen, I have experienced more Bible Study nights with my friends whom I found to be true friends.
If I could have listen, my family’s financial burden would have been much be better earlier on.
If I could have listen, I would not have acted out rashly and confessed to a guy who eventually broke my heart terribly.
If I could have listen, I would not have dyed my hair blonde and I wouldn’t be caught by my assistant dean.
If I could have listen, I could have been friends with a Pastor who could have joyfully recommended me for Medicine.
If I could have listen, I would not have made terrible decisions in life.
If I could have listen, I could be more prepared and spiritually rooted in Christ for what’s gonna happen to me in 2013 back then.
I finally answered the call of being born again Christian in 2013. It was the feelings and experiences I had in 2012 that urged me to finally answer.
Before, I thought being whiter than snow is by changing a person’s physical appearance. I have done that. I dyed my hair copper then blonde. But it wasn’t due to my hair color or physical appearance can I be whiter than snow.
It was through a personal decision to make Jesus Christ Lord and Savior of my life, to repent of my sins and continue to be sanctified by His Word can I truly be whiter than snow.