When I feel heart burn, there’s this right sided pain as if near my heart but I know anatomically my heart leans to medial left. So I really think this is acid reflux in my esophagus.
And I wouldn’t be surprised if it happens much often because Medicine has so much workload that eating becomes late or optional. I don’t know if I am burn out already because I still try to act tough and as if nothing ails me that much.
And last Friday night, I just wanted to cry because of the seemingly overwhelming burn out (chores at home, messy room and sala, homeworks and reading assignment, food wish list, and love life worries coz my dear friends from Victory already have boyfriends and I can’t understand their situation). Add the fact I am the odd one out in an Adventist school. I know I should be responsible why I choose AUP and must abide or respect their culture. But at my breaking point, it pains me much to make sacrifices. And in my mind, I believe there is no Adventist or other forms of Christianity in front of God. It’s just two kinds of people in front of God: a repentant believer or a hard-hearted/stiff-necked unbeliever. It’s like with the saying of Paul that no Jew or Greek before God.
And since I can’t find anyone to comfort me Friday evening which I was teary-eyed and at my breaking point, I played over and over again “Steady My Heart” by Kari Jobe.